Monday, October 1, 2007

A good feeling

Today was great. I started my new old job, which was met with a ton of bureaucracy and an early exit, but it felt great! I forgot how much I enjoy having a job and how much my job defines me. Certainly being a stay-at-home-mom (SAHM) is a full-time plus overtime job, and I admire women who do that job, but really, it wasn't and isn't for me. I love my baby, but a big part of who I am is my career. I missed it, and I am happy to be back. I'm not sure how else to describe the feeling. I needed to go back to work-- for my own mental health and self-confidence-- and now I have that.

The Boy also had a great day at Play and Learn Preschool (PLP), and it is a big relief that daycare is going better! He ate like a champ today; did his first art project; and did not cry when I dropped him off! On top of all that, when I picked him up, he wanted me, but did not cling to me like he had been. Oh yeah, he also went right in to the carseat without fighting, which was not the case the past two weeks when he wanted to be held forever!

The only thing that would have made my day more perfect? To have Kevin here. But I remind myself why we are doing this, and the future looks bright. Sunny days are in our future.

I know this is supposed to be my mind-dump/political/intellectual blog, but I started writing about my SAHM vs. Working mom thoughts (based solely on my own experiences and life and not what I think others should do, because I think everyone needs to do what is right for their situation), but I did not want to feel like I was devaluing either position, because I think both jobs are important. Anyway... I'll leave that one alone for now. :)


KaritaG said...

I understand. One of the scariest things for me when I think about having a baby is the impact to my job. Voicing that type of fear is usually met with a response indicating that you are too shallow, too selfish, or in some other way incapable of truly valuing and loving your child if you are THAT WORRIED about its affect on your job. It's frustrating, but like you, I know staying at home is not going to work for me. I would lose my mind. It all boils down to, we, as women, should be able to do what is best for us without being judged by other women. Not only are we our own personal harshest critics, but we are each other's harshest critics as well.

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