Wow. I can not believe it has been two years. Have I said wow? I never thought I would make it this far, and I forget that others do not do the same. Long lost friends (hi Lauren!!!) have contacted me to say they found my blog one way or another, and in reading it they have been inspired to nurse just a little longer (or a lot).
People often comment about my dedication and commitment, but in reality, nursing has become such an engrained part of my life, I am not sure where I would be or what life would be like without it. A week ago, a good friend of mine delivered premature triplets. Unfortunately, one did not make it, but the other two are doing amazingly well. I remarked to that friend that I admire HER commitment. She is pumping, exclusively, for her little boys. My friend tells me that the boys' pediatrician will not see them unless she is nursing/pumping. I could not help but smile. My friend is amazing, and I am incredibly proud of her for pumping when nothing came out (though supply is high now).
So what is it like to nurse my two year old?
It is amazing and challenging all at the same time. We still nurse on demand, but the demand has dropped significantly. Right now, it usually means once at night, once between 2-5 am and once as he wakes up in the morning. On weekends, there is also a pre-nap session.
The Boy openly communicates his desire to nurse. He also will tell me which side he wants, and after taking one will sit up and say "want other side." At night, he whispers 'want nurse' and 'other side' so softly and gently it melts my heart. In the mornings, he does considerably better when he can nurse before getting out of bed. It starts his day off right.
The Boy and I still use nursing to reconnect though. I can tell if I have been gone too much or focusing on other things in his presence, because he will ask to nurse more those days or weeks. When needed, nursing helps with his emotional balance, big changes (i.e. Kevin leaving for the season), fixing owies, and all around bad days. Some days he just wants me to 'sit on couch' with him, but others he needs more, and I am ok with that.
We still nurse in public, and so far, no one has said much about it. Every once in a while there is a look, but I just ignore it. I am not embarrassed...at least I have not been.
He does not bite.
Some day he will wean himself.
When that day comes, I will probably cry, but I will also know I gave him what he needed.
Yes, needed not wanted.
Where has the time gone?